I heard this for the first time on the proper mixing sound room set up since I'd made quite a few changes the other day, and made the decision not to make any more changes to it. It's sounding good, I reckon. Certainly a lot better than I had anticipated being able to achieve. Here it is...
Sound Re-Design - Finished from Retchy on Vimeo.
Certainly a lot more subtle than previous versions, the changes from the last version I uploaded are probably too small to be noticeable on normal computer speakers though. The main change is in the sound of the repeating, throbbing noise - I've layered it up with two other sounds to soften it a bit, and automated the reverberation and volume settings for each in and out point of every pulse. I've also tidied up the end to make it slightly less unsure of itself, and sorted out the levels for the whole track, which makes a huge difference to the overall feel of the clip - everything just sits together so much more nicely, and the range of frequencies are much clearer now.
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